Word of the Day - AGRO

Aggravated - Definition: to make worse or more severe; intensify, as anything evil, disorderly, or troublesome.

In short, I like to say I am AGRO when I am aggravated by life. Today I would like to share the climax of my AGRO day, yesterday.

I spent the majority of my day at work listening to soul draining music while worming my hands across a keyboard to produce a multitude of "somethings". By the time the clock hit 4:00 pm and the dust clouds settled from my footsteps I was rolling down depressing dreary streets so I could get to the promise land, HOME. Yes home, my sanctuary, my cloud of hope and apparently the home of a newly created crabby patty, MY HUSBAND. Apparently the dogs and their hole digging are driving my husband to turn into a mini plankton, hence, on this particular day, I've become even more AGRO due to my husband's aggravation.

I have a thought; I will flee to the only other place that can keep me calm, Target. Yes, let me stroll the white laminate floors while floating behind a basket of red while eye checking the tremendous amount of non-necessities that will hopefully not end up in my basket. Yes, I will go to Target. Apparently my mini me (daughter) and crabby patty (husband) will also be going along. By now I am trying to keep my AGRO in check, but I am failing and you can see my family's endless want to shove me in the red basket, place blinders on my head and make a speedy departure to the checkout lanes.

Luckily my sweet daughter asks to look at toys and of course I concede to her request. As my two target companions methodically look at every Mattel toy available I wander into the sporting goods section. In hindsight, this was a BAD idea. I am not an athletic person but years ago I did play a good amount of tennis and have recently contemplated picking up a racket again. Perhaps I should have waited one more day. A shiny blue over sized racket was calling me, "pick me up, pick me up". I should have known better. I grabbed the racket by the handle and hit the strings against the palm of my other hand. Hit one, hit two, hit three, hit four and then a flurry of blue came flying towards my head. I had hit the racket with such force that it ricocheted off my palm and hit me square between the eyes and forehead.

I stood in the middle of the sporting good aisle dumbfounded and in pain. WHAT IN THE HELL JUST HAPPEN? Really? Did I just smack myself in the head with a tennis racket, did an evil blue tennis racket attack my AGRO self? YES IT DID. I stood there imagining security watching me on the cameras and having a good laugh at my expense. Perhaps I will end up on YouTube within days. I hung up the racket and sulked back to the toy aisle where my husband immediately said, "what in the hell happen to you"? I had a large red line forming down my forehead and a bruised ego in tow.

Please get me out of here was the only thing I could think of. Please get me home. Please let me sulk into the couch so I can wait for tomorrow. Here I am, almost 24 hours later laughing at myself. Let us hope the rest of this day is better. I might think twice about picking up a racket again. Think about the damage I could do if I were actually on a court.